jillar

jillar Quit Date: May 29, 2016 Posted May 18, 2018 Why is quitting So hard by jwg » Wed Aug 29, 2012 4:01 pm So that is the question , why is quitting so hard ? I think there is only one reason quitting it so hard to do Or maybe two reasons , at most three to five ,, less then ten for sure.. Sadly I don’t think most here will agree with me nor will they aperciate my opion , and that really all this. My opion . A view from my porch and from my experiences , nothing more So there that’s the warning , take it with a grain of salt The reasons quitting is hard to do First off its hard because ,, You want it to be! And yes I think that is true most people want quitting to be the hardest thing thay have ever done in there life,,,WHY ? So they can then justify in there mind why on earth they smoked for so long,, after all if quitting was “easy” they would feel like quite the heal for not quitting years ago. So in order to live with them self in a balance of peace , quitting must then be difficult. Plus with quitting being so hard to do, it gives the quitter a boost in there personal moral on how “hard” they fought and won .. The quitter wants quitting to be hard to do , so they do not have to Accept loved ones could have prevented there suffering and death if they could have easily quit. And then there is the aspect of quitting is “so hard to do” because they have been told it was for years , and like the sentence above , have even been to the funerals that proved this to be true. If you want to quit smoking and fit in with others who quit smoking , then by god you have to suffer threw it just like they did too. After all no one gets a free pass when it comes to quitting smoking ,, “The hardest thing in the world to do” Well to each there own , but it all honesty . to stop smoking is not that hard to do it at all , In fact NO ONE that ever really wanted to Quit Smoking has ever failed.. To stop smoking dose not cause pain , where as healing from most other things in fact dose , A sun burn carries with it much greater pain then any one ever suffered to stop smoking. Mentally, a spelling test is harder then it is to quit smoking .. And lastly, why quitting is so hard to do ? , because before most ever start they go into already granting them selfs permission to fail. And then this failure only dose one thing , grants them permission once more , So this goes back to my point , quitting is only hard because most just want it that way. But I know first hand , that dose not have to be the way it is and in fact if focused on the rewards vs the discomforts , quitting hands down is the easiest thing any one has ever done for them selfs If smoking is a temp pleasure with long term consequences Then to stop is is temp discomfort with long term benefits Break the cycle , evaluate your quit honestly with out the desire for it to be “so hard” and not only will you see it is not as you have been lead to believe , but too you will learn to enjoy the process of becoming free to do all the things you once sat around and labeled “one of these days” 'jwg' Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/10421-why-is-quitting-so-hard-repost-by-jwg/

2. Climb over it

LOVE it!! Congratulations @Kdad, you're doing great. I also get a thought to smoke pop into my head. I stop short of calling it a crave because it has no power when it comes.

2. make wontons

@Cbdave, i was thinking that you might try googling an iPhone forum to ask the question there. I'm sure others have probably had the same problems. @QuittingGirl, signatures are hidden on smartphones but I still have my likes.

@Cbdave, have you tried deleting your cookies then logging back in? Sometimes that's all that's needed. Maybe give it a try?

@Jordan7 joins the decade party today!! Congratulations my friend, I hope you're doing well and stop by to say hi soon

Sazerac Quit Date: October 23, 2013, A Good Day to be Free. Posted July 20, 2016 *Want better Health immediately ? *Want extra Money in your pocket now ? *Want more enjoyment from Sexual encounters tonight ? Well then, it's Time to free yourself from nicotine addiction ! You can start by giving yourself 72 hours because in three days nicotine begins to leave your body. Take the weekend and pull the covers over your head if you need to. Strengthen your resolve and understand that any discomfort is temporary. Give yourself another three days...give yourself Time. What else are you doing that could possibly be more important than saving your life, liberating your sovereigns and making you better in bed ? You only have to go through this ONCE so, enjoy the ride. Soon you will be seeing astoundingly positive results. You are evolving into a new person, more honest with yourself, much more confident, happier, healthier, wealthier, and wow ! out of this world in-between the sheets. No kidding. Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/7322-sex-health-money-time/

Great idea @Doreensfree, I was also thinking that he could take it to his local cellphone store and they could show him how to do it

Welcome aboard @joan I'm sorry to read that you started smoking again after such a long quit. Tools I used/use is my JAC (jillars air cigarette). This works so well at tricking your mind into thinking it's getting the real thing. I also sucked on soft peppermint puffs all day long my whole first year. I don't know about you but I never smoked and ate so keeping those candies in my mouth really helped. I also posted for support whenever I was feeling I might cave to a crave and members would talk me down and help me past it. This support is priceless and we love paying it forward so hopefully you'll try it so we can help you too

Hi Linda, I'm really happy to read that you're still smoke free, that's AWESOME!!! Thanks for checking in

Congratulations on half a year quit @Genecanuck, that's fantastic!!

Congratulations on your second year quit @Brioski, hope you're having a great day!

Congratulations @Penguin

9. Moisten a bowl of cereal

The mess everywhere. The table had spilled food stuck to it, the

5. Make potato soup

AceWhite Quit Date: 2/7/2021 Posted March 6, 2021 Hi fellow NOPE'ers I've been thinking about how my quit is like being on an airplane. The first part of the quit is like a takeoff. A whoosh of a new feeling- some excitement even as I embarked on a journey and reached new heights. Slowly, as i've gained altitude, space between myself and that last smoke, I feel now at almost one moth in i'm hitting the cruising altitude, but with altitude comes pressure. I've hit some turbulence on my way to this height, but I kept climbing. For awhile, the clouds obscured my vision, and I felt like I could step off at at moment, back into my smoke filled haze, for just a quick moment and be ok, but that surely would've been an unwise move on my part, because instantly i'd fall back down and lose all my altitude. For now, i'm keeping my sealtbelt attached, ready for the bumps that may come with the cruise, but i'm prepared for the trip. In my lap is my reading material from Quit, in my heart is my desire, and in my soul is my strength. Headed off into the horizon where there are no more clouds Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/15282-reaching-cruising-altitude/

3. Make mashed potatoes

1. Make pudding

I agree with @DenaliBlues and @Penguin that it was probably contextual. Maybe if you had of added something like it being just another reason to keep your quit and if you're not quit then to quit. Maybe it wouldn't have sounded as negative?

Congratulations @DenaliBlues on your awesome quit. You've gone through some struggles and still give your all to support everyone here so I hope today you take the time to treat yourself! Xoxo

DenaliBlues Quit Date: 2/10/2022 Posted August 30 A lot of couples struggle when one person quits smoking and the other does not. I’ve been reflecting on recent Quit Train discussions on this topic, because for decades I was "the smoking spouse." I didn’t smoke in our home or in our car. But the smoke clung to me and was present everywhere I went. It caused a ton of tension with my mate. The stink. The health worries. The temptation to join in. She H-A-T-E-D my smoking. That felt like a very personal rejection to me. She knew I was a smoker before we got together (and even joined in sometimes), so why couldn’t she accept me for who I was? I was making my own choices. Why did she want me to give up something I loved? She had bad habits that bugged me, so why couldn’t I have a bad habit that bugged her? All of this felt very visceral and valid on the surface. But in actuality it was stinkin thinkin, and a rotten heap of rationalization. My smoking was not a mere “bad habit.” It was a raging addiction. And living with an addict is tough. Getting my fix of nicotine was always the priority, always the organizing principle of our lives, one that I superimposed on her without her consent. Smoking was how I spent a lot of my time and money. Over and over again, I’d walk away from her – literally and figuratively – to go smoke. Over and over again, I chose to put my own gratification first - above her feelings and fears. This de-centered and abandoned her in subtle but significant ways. Not the kind of spouse I wanted to be. My partner knew better than to try to force me to quit. She knew that breaking an addiction only happens from an internal commitment. But we still fought about it. And what I learned during those fights (eventually… begrudgingly… belatedly…) turned out to be important. It helped me recognize how my smoking affected her. I also became weary of all the tension around the issue. I had an ambivalent relationship with smoking anyway. Was it really worth all the crap it was causing? As this was percolating, I was also watching my father die. He was sick for many years, and my mother sacrificed everything for his care. It depleted her physically, financially, and emotionally. Watching that slow motion tragedy was instructive. I didn’t want that for my relationship. Getting old is hard enough, even without complications from smoking. There’s no predicting what the lotto of life will toss our way, but my smoking was unilaterally increasing the odds of a bad outcome that would affect her deeply. Again, not the kind of spouse I wanted to be. I ultimately made my own decision to stop smoking. My partner was not the only reason I quit, but it was a big one. To this day, supporting her wellbeing is something I can hold onto and use to protect my quit when cravings arise. Two highly independent people will always butt heads occasionally. I still annoy her sometimes, and vice versa. But quitting has right-sized our conflicts. Before I quit, small tensions absorbed extra energy from the major unresolved conflict between us (smoking). Refreshingly, now we just argue about dishes or yard work or whatever, without loaded subtext. I was fearful that I would feel resentful, but the opposite is actually true. Quitting is freeing. It's so much simpler. And the benefits for my partner are a beautiful part of my recovery journey. I’m grateful for the chance to be on this healing road, with plenty of help from the good souls here on the Quit Train. Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/26752-i-was-the-smoking-spouse/

You'll be fine @Kdad, just keep posting and getting through them one by one and they WILL get weaker I promise. You're doing great!