Seems like I get around to this every six weeks or so. Lazy sod!
Last time I did one of these at 10 weeks in, I talked about how quitting was pissing me off, it felt like a daily grind and I was tired, but kind of seeing some benefits at the same time.
So what have the last six weeks brought?
I had more tough times, particularly in the early part of the period, but participating here, with friends, helps immensely. I'm still having urges to smoke at times, particularly related to those things that I'm starting to do for the first time since quit, now that spring has sprung. Fortunately having read about it here, I was ready for it. At ten weeks I thought those urges to smoke were between 50% and 75% the intensity compared when I first quit. The really good news now is that this has become much easier, probably no more than 50% intensity. I still have to be on my guard, I still have to make the smart choice, but I am better equipped to do so.
Little successes have helped. Out drinking recently and wandering home with people outside the pub smoking, I had a wouldn't that be good moment. I actually, for the first time, truthfully answered my own question with a "No, it wouldn't". Even in my slightly inebriated state I could recognize it would have tasted like crap and would have made me feel like crap the next day, without even getting into the tossing the quit question. The morning after the night before the conviction wasn't quite as strong, but easily dealt with.
And in the last 4 weeks I have really noticed a change in my breathing. It is easy in a way I don't ever remember.
So, first 3.5 months have been about survival and nurturing the quit. I understand when people talk about romancing the cigarette, because I still do to a degree, that's still a work in progress. The last couple of weeks though has been the first time I'm feeling truly happy about being smoke free.
So now for the big one, I have committed to myself that the next 4 months I need to be smoke free. The posts from Sazerac about treating yourself, well I've taken it to heart and have gone big.
The next 4 months smoke free = Payment for 1 charity trek for me to The Grand Canyon in October
I wouldn't have done this before, but what the hell, I'm saving that money, I get to help a kids charity and it sounds like an awesome trip. Now all I need to do is lose some of this bloody weight before hand.
Chat to you around the 6 month mark my friends!
