Christian99

I am just learning this terrible news. I met Jillar on the OG Quitnet site, and I've always been so inspired by and grateful for her contributions to that place, QSMB, and Quittrain. I extend my deepest condolences to her family and friends, Christian99

Hi Tkon-- You've just made the most important decision of your life, and I applaud you for it: becoming smoke-free will absolutely change your life. Even now, many years after I quit, I benefit from lessons I learned and strategies I practiced during the most difficult periods of quitting. There are so many ways to quit--and I'd encourage you to read as widely as possible on the different approaches--but I really benefited from lots of exercise. If that's a reasonable option for you, I'd encourage you to give it a try. But that's just one way--do whatever it takes (and whatever aligns most closely with your personality) to remain smoke-free. We all know you can do it, friend!! Christian99 23+ Years Quit

Hi ammj-- Welcome, friend--we know you can do it! Something that helped me was exercise--it helped manage excess anxiety and gave me something positive and proactive on which to focus, instead of just the thing I was ostensibly denying myself. Nicotine gum for a few months also helped. Hang in there! Christian99 23+ Years Quit

Incredible, Wendy!!! Warmest congratulations Christian99

I still get one or two smoking dreams per year: they're incredibly distressing to me, and they tend to ruin a day or two for me. I've come to the conclusion that these have nothing to do with smoking; instead, I see them as manifestations of broader anxieties about "failure," feeling like an imposter, etc. To have resumed smoking is just my brain's most powerful expression of those anxieties. But they still suck. Christian99 23+ Years Quit

Hi MLMR-- I, too, struggled with serial failed quits, and I know how discouraging it feels. Realizing that my approach wasn't working, I decided to take a more radical approach: instead of "just" quitting, I decided to situate quitting in the larger project of GETTING HEALTHY. This included significant changes to my diet and a really serious fitness program, which gave me lots of positive, proactive things to think and learn about instead of obsessing over the thing I was ostensibly denying myself. In addition, I hoped that these new activities would accelerate the process of seeing myself as a non-smoker, creating another line of defense during those inevitable moments of vulnerability. While this new approach certainly didn't make quitting easy, it made it possible for me; I'm forever grateful that I tried it. It's probably true that I went a little overboard with the diet and exercise during that first year, but many years later I'm still convinced that this was the way it needed to be for me. My point really isn't to encourage you to adopt my method (though it's worth thinking about); instead, I'm sharing it as an example of doing something(s) different. What would a different set of actions look like for you? Shifting the emphasis to practice--and pretty radical practice at that--as opposed to how I was thinking about cigarettes really helped me. We know you can do it! Christian99 23+ Years Quit

Awesome, Run!! C99

Thanks, friend.

Hi MIke-- FWIW, I'd urge patience and grace with yourself regarding the patch: while I think I'm sort of in the minority on this site when it comes to NRT, I'm convinced that the most--and perhaps ONLY--important thing that matters is not smoking or vaping. If patches are helping you maintain complete abstinence (and you're achieving that), that is an absolute, unqualified success. Years ago, when I was very active in smoking cessation communities and very aware of the best peer-reviewed smoking addiction research, it was clear to me to that the scientific consensus was that not smoking was and should be the emphasis. In fact, many addiction experts were recommending NRT beyond the officially stated guidelines. In my experience, it's best to see smoking/vaping as the enemy, NOT nicotine. I'll admit that my "expertise" (such as it is/was), is probably about 15 years old, so I can't really speak to what the contemporary research shows. But I'd say you're doing great, friend. Do whatever you need to do to maintain this momentum. Keep up the great work! Christian99 Nearing 23 years quit

We're so happy you're here, Deggit! For many of us, it took multiple attempts before finding and executing our forever quit, so you're not alone. My suggestion is to try something different--that is, try adding a new dimension to this (forever!) quit. For me, that new dimension was exercise and a new approach to food and nutrition. Making some important changes in these areas gave me something positive and proactive to focus on, instead of just the thing that I was avoiding. But whatever approach you use, know that it CAN be done, and it will absolutely transform your life. Christian99 22+ Years Quit

Hi Diane-- FWIW, I'd say don't worry at all about the nicotine lozenges: the "enemy" here is cigarettes, not nicotine. Any day that you don't smoke is a win. Period. The first few weeks and months can really, really suck. They certainly did for me. I often tell people that quitting was far more difficult than I expected (and I think I went in with reasonable expectations) AND far more transformative. You're experiencing the former; the latter awaits you, I promise. Hang in there, friend-- Christian99 22 1/2 Years Quit

Thank you, Gus. I wish you peace and comfort in your loss. C99

I can't watch the following ad without crying, in large part because the man bears a striking resemblance to my brother, who died a terrible death from lung cancer at age 42. https://www.google.com/search?q=que+sera+sera+smoking+ad&oq=que+sera+sera+smoking+ad&gs_lcrp=EgZjaHJvbWUyBggAEEUYOTIHCAEQIRigATIHCAIQIRigATIHCAMQIRigATIHCAQQIRigATIHCAUQIRigAdIBCDU1ODRqMGo3qAIAsAIA&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:24cf3297,vid:8TCS9LbihCQ,st:0

Welcome back, tocevoD. It's a great idea, I think, to get back to the gym on a regular basis: this was a crucial dimension of my own quit. I paired that with some significant changes in my diet as well, hoping that the fitness and food would give me things in which I could actively engage and on which I could focus my attention (instead of on the thing I was ostensibly denying myself). Another way to say this is that I began a self-improvement project centered on HEALTH, of which quitting smoking was just one (super important) part. Whatever approach you use (and, BTW, the "Ben and Jerry's Plan" is just as legitimate and noble as my more abstemious one), we know you can do it and will be cheering you on. Christian99 22+ Years Quit

Warmest congratulations, Jillar! I deeply admire your commitment and contributions to this site and to fellow quitters. Christian99