Kellemae

Why does time move sooo slow in the morning now.... i just had an argumemt with my boyfriend about me quitting smoking, he has quit and it was easy for him, he doesnt believe that i will quit for good this time, i told him i dont need his pesimistic attitude, he told me he wasnt being pesimistic or whatever.... iv tuned him out at this point, but i told him how he feels about my quit doesnt matter to me, that im not going to let what he says change my ideas because if i thought the way he did and let my past failed attempts get to me, ill never quit, then he said whatever, i never ask him how he feels about anything, i told him he is right, i dont because how he feels doesnt matter, its how i feel that matters to me.... i told him he does the same thing, i asked him did he ever ask how i felt about him quitting smoking, no.... did he ask how i felt about him going back to school, or about going back on the road for the summer.... no because how i felt didnt really matter.... what makes him think i would ask him how he felt about me quitting smoking...... he realized how stupid that sounded and for once he shut up..... i know he means well, it just doesnt help me he does want me to quit, but he doesnt believe i will and that makes me want to cry.

How do u guys get the video to actually pop up instead of just the link?

Nancy, Thanks for being here.... thank u for helping us nubes see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Here we go. ... nope

I am 31 and have been a smoker for 14 years. The reason for my quit is to live to my full potential. Im going through a very serious life change right now because i am not happy with alot in my life. My job kept me traveling all over the united states, it also turned me into a fat and heavy smoker. Its hard living in a 20 by 30 room everyday for months on end. I gave that job up a little over a year ago. I obtained my CNA license and a new job that is very rewarding. I am finishing up some general education courses and will be starting the nursing program next spring. My weight is an issue, i start on friday with a personal trainer and nutritional specialist to help me get back to a body and self esteem i like. As for smoking, i had a false start yesterday. I woke up this morning and paniced when i realized today was the day i was supposed to take the test to enroll into the nursing program. I know its an excuse and i could have done it without the cigarettes, but to me the risk of failing that test was worse then just 1 more day of being a smoker, sad as it sounds. After i passed the test, i beat myself up for leaning on cigarettes, i didnt even want to include that info in this post, but omitting it is just as bad as lying about it, and i cant start this journey on false premises. My quit day that i set for myself a few weeks ago is June 1st which is tomorrow. I plan to wake up a non-smoker and never look back.... i did get a taste of what "hell week" is all about and i am more prepared for it. I have so much to look forward to and i want to thank you guys in advance for helping me through the rough patches.

Thanks to all who have helped me through my first day, this nicotine terrorist is still bugging me so i'm going to bed and listen to some hypnotherapy/relaxation tracks to help numb my mind

On my way home from work it will take all i have not to stop at a gas station

Mine was shout https://youtu.be/ZEWwZNUafKo

I feel like im crazy.... cuz im fighting myself to control myself.... i feel like i need to be locked up for the sanity of others.... the voice in my head is trying to negotiate saying u didnt want to quit today... u set the date for june 1st, come on, just one more pack... am i going crazy?

Lol... and it finally starts, 8 hrs in and the little voice is back saying hey... psst.... lets go buy a pack..... trigger eating food

Anyone feel like they just want to sleep through the rest of the day.... im on day 1, the cravings rnt that bad.... yet, but im so tired. I slept till 10am then took a nap from 11pm till around 1pm.... and now its only 3:30. And i could use another nap.... what gives? Anyone know why this is happening?

I have to focus on the money right now.... i dont see any medical issues but i dont want the medical issues.... i am 31 years old, hated cigarettes when i was a kid.... i started smoking when i turned 18, partially because i could, and partially because i missed the smell in some weird way, both my patents smoked all of my childhood, my father quit to little to late and died at 48 of heart failure. My mom died at 50 still a smoker and had heart issues as well.... i dont want to be like them. But because i dont have any issues medically yet, that does not help in quitting.... i still believe im invincible at times.... but im starting to come to the reality that im not as superhuman as i thought i was. My great grandmother died at 98.... lived a full and healthy life.... she litterally died of old age.... i want to be like her, she smoked for 15 years and quit when she started having children.... im 13 years in at this point.. i dont have kids but i dont need that as a reason, i still need to change my lifestyle because if i dont i will become my worse nightmare

Ill put my pledge in today NOPE!!

I am committing to myself... i just invested my cigarette money for the next 6 months.... no excuses now cuz i cant even afford to buy any more.

Ok, iv watched 3 hrs of videos read dozens of your posts.... and frankly i need to get on with my day... i think i am finally ready. I have had my last cigarette.... i am standing at the kitchen sink with my last pack that has 5 full cigarettes in it.... i am about to do something that i was never able to do before which is purposly running water over these cancer sticks.... i always needed to finish a pack, something is different this time but this is still nerve wracking. What a waste of money is my main thought, but really it was a waste of money to buy the pack in the first place.... here goes nothing, im going to do it, i am strong.

I write this as i lay in my bed, the last few weeks i have stressed myself out about smoking, playing with the idea of quitting. The past 3 months i have been kicking myself every time i bought a pack of cigarettes. I have 2 friends who recently quit, they make it look so easy, what is wrong with me that i cant just jump? Why do i torture myself going hours without a cigarette to finally break down and buy a pack because i have put myself through mental anguish. I am jealous that they find quitting so easy, when i tend to hyperventilate when i try. But in the morning i will do it again. Here goes nothing.