PixelSketch

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Great job Peace Train! This calls for a happy dance!

7 weeks is AWESOME!!! Great job! :yahoo:

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Anything for you, Doreen!

-20

Thank you so much everyone! :wub: Agreed! Sometimes, though, you have to put the oxygen mask on yourself first before you help the person next to you. If Air Canada said it, it must be true. :P Everyone finds their own way through this. I finally got to the point where I could come back. While I probably won't be here every day, I will be here more and I will post whenever I think I can be of help. :wub:

Greetings from the land of wandering moose and timbits! :wacko: It's been a very long time since I checked in. I'm actually not altogether sure when I signed in last. I guess I reached a stage where I didn't want to think or talk or read or hear about smoking. Not even in a positive "yay, we're smoke-free!" kind of way. It took me a long time to figure that out. My early days were filled with nothing but thoughts of smoking. Once I reached a stage where it hardly ever crossed my mind, I suppose I didn't want to encourage those thoughts to come back. I didn't mean to leave so abruptly, in fact I never meant to leave at all, but every time I started to sign in, something stopped me. And then one day turned into two, and then into a week and a month and before I knew it...today had arrived. Yesterday I marked six months smoke-free. And I felt the need to come back and let you all know, that though you may not see or hear me, I'm still on the train with you. I quit romancing the cigarette months ago. I found a new love. Maybe even an obsession. It's actually a very old love. I'm back into weight lifting. Any free time I have is spent at the barbell, aiming to lift ever heavier things and put them back down again. It's spent creating meal plans, and counting macros. It's spent running, with the wind in my hair and the rhythmic tattoo of my shoes on the pavement. I often think of you guys when I run. And I send up thoughts hoping you're all well, and still riding the train. And I send up a thank you. Because without your support through those very tough early days, I wouldn't be pushing my lungs well beyond what I thought they were capable of. I wouldn't be lifting weights I've only dreamed of lifting. I wouldn't feel as strong and healthy and full of possibilities as I do now. And it's those possibilities that matter the most. If you're struggling right now, and wondering if this quit is really worth the pain you're feeling right now, listen up. Six months ago, I had certainties, but no possibilities in my life. A big giant pack of cigarettes had suffocated those. I was certain my allergies and my wheezing was getting worse. I was certain I, a former athlete, could not walk briskly down the street without getting short of breath. I was certain I could not get through one day without coughing. And I was certain that smoking would bring me an early, and unpleasant, end. Today, well, the future is uncertain. But it's full of new goals and dreams and, yes, possibilities. It's amazing how your life gets bigger somehow, and makes space for new adventures, when you're no longer planning the majority of your days around a cigarette. Suddenly there's time for...living. Do I ever think about having a smoke? Yes. But it's just a thought. It doesn't happen often. And I remind myself of what my life looks like now, and what it looked like then, and that makes the choice, and it is a choice, an easy one for me. NOPE. My hope is that everyone here keeps on choosing NOPE too. Every single day. Because it gets better. And it will be worth it. You'll see. Hugs, Ali

-5

NOPE!

I'm here!!

-3

Go Feely!!! You've made it through a tough week and every day is another day into a happier life. Enjoy the ride. It gets sweeter each day. :D

Congrats on 1 Month!!! That's fantastic!!

Happy Happy Birthday Boo!! Hope you have an awesome day!!!! Wishing you much happiness!

-2

WoooooHooooooooooooo!!!!!! :D Thank you so much everyone!!! :wub: It means a lot to me to have your support, especially when I haven't been able to be here in the last while. And though I haven't been here, you guys are always in my thoughts. And it's a great comfort to know you're here. Two months feels wonderful!!! Honestly, if you're in the early days of your quit - STICK WITH IT! I know it feels hard now, but it gets so much better, so much faster than you could imagine. :yahoo: Two months in, and smoking feels like it happened to someone else in another life. I very rarely have a faint thought of smoking, but it's so vague now, I just don't care. I did have my first and only smoking dream a couple of weeks ago. I woke up really pissed off, convinced I had smoked and blown my quit. The relief at finding out it was just a dream was enormous. Whew!!!!! Quit intact. But it's incredible how real that dream felt!!! To combat the stress of my current work schedule, I've upped my workouts. Overhauled my eating plan to deal with the extra workout load - to make sure I have enough energy for the workout, recovery and just life - and have rediscovered the pure joy of moving my butt again. And I've lost 6lbs! LOL I've worked out regularly all my life, but now I can go with the intensity of days long gone again, now that I can breathe again. It feels awesome. I spent an hour running up and down hills in a nearby park a couple of days ago. Hills are something I've avoided the last few years because my lungs would rebel. I do weight training 4x a week. And interval training. And I run. And walk. And jump!! I'm on 6x a week workouts with one rest day. And I find I now have so much energy, the rest day is more challenging than the workout days!! What??? I'm having so much fun. It feels so so so good to be a non-smoker. And to think that just over two months ago, I really believed that I would never be able to stop smoking. That I would be chained to that addiction for the rest of my life. That I would die from it. I felt so hopeless. So down. And utterly demoralized. It's amazing what can happen when you take that first step and commit to NOPE. The days of NOPE add up and once the benefits start coming, THOSE become your new addiction. I'm addicted to deep breathing. And hill running. And just living again. Fully. I'm addicted to feeling joy again. I can't stop smiling. I look like an idiot. But, hey, I'm a happy idiot. So, it's all good. :lol22: I've delivered most of the elements in the project, client is happy, and I have one more to finish. Should be done by end of this coming week and then I'll be back here much more often. Finally!!!! It will feel incredible to have this year-long project done. I can't wait to move on to other things!!!!! LOL Miss you guys!!! And...NOPE! :good3:

-8

I love that I can sustain "beast mode" during my workouts for so much longer. It's nice to be able to breathe at the gym again. :D

:lol2: :wacko2: :lol2: :wacko2:

True. One of them is pineapple though. LOL TPBM has taken ballroom dancing lessons.

True. News in whatever form that I can get it. Former journalist. Still in media/creative field. News junkie for life. TPBM runs marathons.

marinade

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