Reciprocity

I guess that was it. She seemed to have thought she had the situation under control because she had cut down to 6 cigs a day. Nothing me or anyone else said to her would make a difference probably ?

I was at the store today and was standing in line with a customer in front of me at the cashier. She was elderly, I would guess around 65 to 70? It was hard to tell as she was very nicely quaffed and dressed but had a pretty wrinkled face. She started some banter with the clerk ringing through her purchase. Clerk: Nice to see you again. It's been awhile. Lady: Yes. I haven't been out much lately because I had a heart attack 2 weeks ago. Clerk: Oh my, I'm sorry to hear that. It's good that you have recovered enough to get out so soon. Lady: Yes it is and I think it's because I have cut down my smoking from 2 packs a day to 6 cigarettes a day since my heart attack (this said with obvious pride). Clerk: Well that's good I suppose but you know, those things can kill you. Lady: Yes, I know. I watched a dear friend of mine die of COPD recently. It was horrible! With that statement, she picked up her purchase and strolled out of the store. So, I'm standing there listening to all this and I'm sure the look on my face was one of complete shock or disdain or something because as the lady left the store, the clerk greeted me at the counter and asked if I was alright? I just mumbled something at her, paid for my purchase and left the store, still watching the lady slowly crossing the parking lot toward her car. Even then (outside the store) I wondered to myself ...... should I approach the lady and speak to her about quitting - I mean; really quitting! Clearly she was fooling herself into believing she could "cut down" and avoid any serious sacrifice and that was good enough to allow her health to improve? You know as well as I do that she'll be back to 2 packs a day by Christmas or sooner. So, just wondering what you would have done in this situation? Intervene or just stay out of it because, none of my business and she was a complete stranger to me. I did nothing but go on my way feeling very uncomfortable and sad for the lady because she was clearly fooling herself. I'm not sure I could have confronted a complete stranger in that manner anyway. I don't want to be one of those "reformed smokers" who butts into everyone's lives preaching the no-smoking gospel but, holy cow! This lady needs a reality check if she wants to stick around much longer.

All these 1st time situations we face as non-smokers; seasonal changes, first family get together, first party or BBQ and vacations are experiences that help cement our permanent quits! That's why the 1 year commitment is SO important. After a full year, we experience most life situations that we used to relate to as smokers. Now, after that 1st year, you will have experienced them as a non-smoker. That's retraining our brain to function happily as a non-smoker. Well done Parsley! Another new experience crossed of your quit list

Makes sense to me that if these dreams are upsetting you, it's a good thing in a way. You are obviously very committed and focused on your quit or else instead of upsetting you, these dreams would be pleasing to you. That's gotta be a good thing - right? It's too bad you're having them but I think it's a good sign about the strength of your quit.

Hey Ela! Any reason that brought you here and to this quit is a great reason (Vanity included!!) You will soon be stepping over the threshold of the Lido Deck. How frickin' great is that!!

Great first steps P! This is how you will do it, one day at a time. The birds are gonna love those sunflower seeds

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^^^ Some days it just doesn't pay to get out of bed! Only problem, you never know in advance which days those are

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Powerful post Jane! The damage long term smoking does is horrible - and often not only to the smoker themselves!

Welcome back Pumpkin! Glad to see you having another go at this.I know you can do this because you were have already shown yourself how strong you could be for almost a year. You had some hard knocks that life threw at you and chose to go back to smoking. Quitting now will not only benefit you health wise and in your wallet but it will prove to yourself just how strong you really are. That's one of the truly wonderful benefits of quitting long term - the self pride knowing you can do what you thought was impossible I can't think of a better way to get yourself back on track emotionally than to prove to yourself that you can quit for good - no matter what! And, just look at all the people you have here to support you along the way Show yourself that you are worth it - quit for good this time!

Glad you're sending in your crew of workmen. There's a lot that needs to be done since the last party Hope they're bringing paint too!

You need this education and understanding about nicotine addiction in order to quit successfully for ever! Without this and other quit smoking forums, I'm not sure I would have ever done the research on my own to come to this important understanding. That's the real benefit of smoking cessation boards is the wealth of useful and critical information that is available and the people who have used it in their own quits who can guide you to it. Reading the material, understanding it and putting it into practice is up to you as an individual. Quitting is our individual responsibility. Others can only assist and support you.

Let's see what Buttocks has to say about that ........................

Good to hear you're safe & OK. Maybe I should come for a visit. I love dirt!!

Great job Drangons Fancy! Keep that positive attitude as it will take you far I bet you are feeling better health wise too. Your body is thanking you for that!

Congrats Kelly - great work! Only 1 month away from that Lido Deck. It will be here before you know it.

These things do happen to some after long periods of having otherwise well established quits. Hard to say why exactly but likely a combination of things. Different situation you haven't had to deal with since quitting (unexpectedly finding some smokes) and possibly other issues going on in your head around the same time? Small things that on their own aren't a threat can sometimes combine at the same time to give us an emotionally challenging situation. The other thing is you have probably not had to fight off strong cravings in awhile so when they come out of nowhere unexpectedly, it can really throw us for a loop. Good for getting by that and looking forward, I'll bet you don;t experience that sort of situation very often again. Remember, every situation we face successfully strengthens out quit and weakens the grip our addiction has on us

Nope!

Titwank; OMG ..... Quick!! Run away Babe ?