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Cold turkey 13 Punching pillow 2 Chantix 2 Double clicking the mouse 1 Gum 1 Hard candy 1 Patch 1 Snus 1 betcha didn't see that comin

I won! I probably don't want to know anymore about it.

The only one I haven't said is because Canada uses metric. #2 is practically my mantra.

+12,195=183,721 Whole lotta coffin nails.

...very, very short...

Once upon a time, there was a guy who lived in the sewer. It was a horrible life, and he hated it, and he hated himself for not having the courage to climb out. Then one day he did climb out of the sewer and into the glorious sunshine. Shortly thereafter, for the first time ever he noticed that he had a mosquito bite, and that it itched. But he decided that he would rather learn to scratch an itch than jump back in the s***. The end.

You know that tea kettle dog whistle sound, that you literally hear under your breath, but think is coming from somewhere else? And when you realize it's you, you panic, because it won't go away, and now you've finally done it. And what if it never goes away? What if... I love never hearing that sound. * edited to add knock wood no jinxies cross my heart.

{delete double phone post}}

-11 You just never know.

Well hot damn! One month is always a huge deal, and today it is a little bit huger. In celebration, hows about you empty your inbox? Way to be.

Evelyn, it's ok, everyone wobbles. You're not going to smoke. You said it right in your own SOS, and I absolutely believe you. We all feel bad for Jess, most of all Jess, and I understand how seeing someone a little bit ahead of you stumble can make you feel hopeless, but don't let it. Nobody else has anything to do with you and your choices. You are the boss of you. You don't smoke anymore - hell, you hardly even seem like the same person anymore (in a good way!). That's just not you. And stop being silly about posting an SOS - that was also the right choice, and because of it other people will feel stronger by watching you face your wobble and conquer it. I'm proud of you. Here's a video: *edited to fix Evelyn's message :)

2 is big news. Congratulations Doreen!

{{Note that "multiquote" didn't preserve the item that Babs "fixed", reproduced below.}} Jess, I was sitting here trying to figure out how to say almost exactly the same thing as Babs just said, when she said it. I hesitated because it's so easy to hear this the wrong way - as judgement, or blame - and that's not it at all. It matters because the way you talk about it frames the way you think about, and that can make all the difference. For instance, if I tell you that I lost my car keys, you will probably respond by saying things like "where's the last place you remember them", "did you check your other pants" or "you idiot!". But it won't make any sense to ask me "why" I lost my keys, because losing things is an accident, and somewhat beyond our control - it just happens. But if I tell you I threw my keys away, you will probably ask me why I did that. This is an irrational thing to do, and has consequences - at the very least it's an inconvenience and will make me late, and if I'm in the middle of the desert it might cost me my life. Regardless of the outcome, if I did it on purpose then it makes sense for others to ask me why, and it's important for me to be able to answer. If I don't know why I did it, I will probably not be able to change my behaviour and I will do it again. Anyway, enough - you get the point. You don't owe me or anyone else an explanation, but you do owe it to yourself, because you don't want to do it again. I'm glad you "fessed up", that takes character. I'm happy you're angry, that's a healthy reaction. I'm sad that you're sad, and I'm scared that you're scared - even though I understand these feelings, I don't think they're productive. You did what you did, and it's done. Understand it, learn from it, and let it go. And never take another puff.

Ah, the petulant mewlings of the lizard brain, seductive in its stupidity. It would be funny if it wasn't so serious - you're actually asking us to "remind" you of something you already know perfectly well: THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS ONE. 1=ALL, and you know it. You just wish it wasn't true, or rather your lizard wishes this, and is trying to trick you into thinking you do too. Don't believe it. In time that ridiculous reptile will die with hardly a whisper... but first you have to starve it. Try this thought experiment: what would happen if you just did nothing. Just sat there, letting the cravings and twisted thoughts wash over you and dissipate, tasting them and then letting go? I found that depersonalizing the experience and observing myself was a strangely helpful activity, and kind of interesting, in a morbid sort of way. Anyway, it takes about 5 minutes to smoke a cigarette, and the crave will recede in about that amount of time regardless. So may as well ride it out and see what happens. Repeat as required.

I agree with everyone above. It honestly made me angry to read the article, which is an odd reaction to see from an ex-smoker, but it's just so arrogant and inhumane to screw with people like that who are already at the end of their rope. I actually wouldn't be at all surprised if some bureaucrat figured they could save money by driving up turnover and shortening treatment times - "no really, I'm cured - all better, gotta go thanks!" One of my first "adult" jobs was as a caregiver for people with catastrophic brain injuries. It was one hell of an experience. Most of them were on medications and couldn't be trusted to take them, so those were all kept in the office in a locked cabinet, along with their cigarettes - every single one of them smoked, and the smokes were used as "rewards" (but really punishments) to control behaviour. I was very young and times were different, but I still objected to what seemed a heartless manipulation of their addictions. At the same time, I couldn't imagine depriving those people of one of their only "pleasures", even if it was killing them.

You're welcome wannabreakfree. Hey, I just re-read this thread, and I want to address this: It took me 6 months quit until I could face the idea that I would never smoke again. Up until that point, I kept my head down and never dared lift my eyes to the horizon. Know what? It worked. Some people whisper an amendment to their NOPE - Not One Puff Ever (just for today). Know what else? They're still quit too. Oh, I see Doreen just said what I was saying before I said it. Lovely.

There. I fixed it for you.

For a lot of people, there's a "rule of 3s" - days, weeks, months, where out of the blue there's a rough patch. No idea why, but there it is. I think it's too bad you're disappointed, even though I understand it. Me, I'm proud of you - three weeks of being more of a badass than a lot of people have in them. You were right though - can't give in now!! Go to bed.

I have to admit, I'm a bit mystified why this topic has suddenly sprung to life - is this personality type one that's often encountered? Is it a common experience of those on this board? Does it intersect with smoking in some way? While I'm pretty sure I've run across a few of these in my time, I don't believe I've had a meaningful personal relationship with one. I suppose I should count myself lucky?

That is quite literally the sh!tiest idea I've ever heard.

Massive. Way to go!

Never miss a year, no matter how late. It's too huge. Dentalfloss, you freaking rock!!!

It won't just not taste good, it won't feel good - nothing like the way you remember. You'll have to smoke a whole bunch in succession to reestablish the addiction to the point where you can "enjoy" the relief a cigarette will again provide. But certainly not the first one. You hear about people that have had amputations, and have "phantom" pains and "ghost" itches in parts that are no longer there. I think that's us. Each one of us carries a memory of an itch we can no longer scratch, not without becoming actively addicted again. Which is a lot like cutting off your nose to spite your face, if you see what I mean.

Why do you think you did? I'm going to start asking this question every time I think of it. Not to make anyone feel bad or dwell on a mistake, but because I have a feeling it's important to the next, successful quit. Can you recall what you were thinking at that moment? Not just that you felt tempted, that's a given, but how you rationalized it. But good for you for fessing up and jumping right back on. You are no different than anyone here, you can do this. Ready? Go.

I think it's my favourite meme. It's a real thing, too, that's how our brains evolved, in layers. Beneath the part of your brain that thinks consciously, and speaks in words, and calls itself "me", is an ancient brain that runs towards food, and away from danger, and seeks dopamine-producing activities, like sex and (sadly, by a remarkable biological coincidence) nicotine. When you touch a hot stove and yank your hand away before your conscious mind even registers pain, thank your lizard brain. But that's also what makes it hard to quit. It can't be spoken to, or reasoned with. It's a spoiled toddler off on a tantrum, and the only thing you can tell it is "NOPE"*! *Not One Puff Ever