Romanticizing the cigarette is a tough thing to let go of. Just know, as your signature says...
If you have just one you will be right back where you started, and where you started was desperately wishing you were where you are right now.
PS For me, there is no such thing as "Just One".
This is so true. It will not be just one cigarette. It will lead to more
...and...
You may think that cigarette will calm you down but it will not. It will just feed your nicotine craving and will restart the process of smoking to relive the crave. You will also feel bad for losing your quit.
It is a vicious cycle and it is best to break it once and for all.
It might not feel like it but you are doing great, Michelle. Keep fighting. You can do this.