Jonny5

Bump for Amy. It's a journey Amy, you won't feel so terrible forever. Trust me :-)

I've heard that a lot. I've said it myself too. For me I was able to unravel it to mean that I did not want to be a smoker.... so why did I continue? I was panicking and getting overwhelmed. Just remember, you wish you hadn't started so you wish that you were a non smoker. Wishes alone don't cut it though. Minute by minute pull yourself along. In time you'll deal with things better, just let go of your distorted belief in the cigarettes, and ride the train, and believe in the journey that we have all been on before you. I'm gonna bump my 'where does the train go' thread for you. It's a process. And a personal journey. Trust in it, trust in yourself.

I've had two brain scans due to the severity and debilitating nature of my headaches in the past. I would have a headache 6 days out of 7 for months on end. Quitting smoking easily refuced that to 2 days in 7. And quitting caffeine has reduced it to maybe 1 in 14 days !!! Our bodies don't like poisons!

Horses for courses George, As his friend, I'll listen, and push him if he starts the journey, but the first step is his to take... we know this from our own journeys :-) ...plus he'll kick my butt, and my ego couldn't take a senior citizen giving me an arse kicking lol :-)

It is sad George, unfortunately the same applies for all smokers.... they can only help themselves. All that we can do is Help steer them as they propel themselves under their own steam

I speak of both George, yes they are very different. But in this example I think that mental and physical fortitude combine within high level martial artists.

My Karate teacher is 64, he's trained for 50 years and has a 5th Dan Black Belt. He smokes because he believes he can't quit. Seriously this guy is as strong as they come. Being able to quit is about belief, not strength

Soozie, when your mind is set, and your will is unshakeable, you will realise that smoking/not smoking has no bearing on the other elements of your life. none whatsoever I quit 4 days before the busiest family Christmas I have ever catered for, I done all the prep work, the shopping, fighting through the crowds at the shops, wrapping presents, dealing with inlaws....... I was surprised how dooable it all was. it was my smoker head, the one that said I needed cigarettes to do anything, that had frightened me into thinking I would struggle. I didn't, and nor will you, for as long as you want to be quit more than you want to smoke.

The advice currently on UK TV is that if you've had a cough for more than 3 weeks to go and see a doctor. obviously we expect it as we are healing, but I always endorse getting real world advice from someone who can examine you in the flesh.

fantastic :-)

You sell yourself short my friend. each of us has a different smoking conundrum to solve, it's all pretty much the same physiologically, and the recovery clock ticks the same etc, but it's the crazy justifications that we created that we have to unravel for ourselves. sometimes I find that examples, and analogies can flick a switch for someone, but the personal riddle is yours to solve alone.... and you have found your riddle key :-) you are playing your junkie at his own game :-) very sharp if you ask me :-)

that's a very clever technique, I like that. I imagine that could be quite a good tactic to use when someone is SOS'ing, get them to make a deal withthemselves that they won't smoke until tomorrow, by which time the crisis is likely to be over. kinda like breaking it back down into bite size chunks when the big picture seems too overwhelming.

It's funny looking back, as a teen, I would look for cigarette butts, and roll out the remaining tobacco into a little tin to make "butt rollies" as we would call them. it's pretty disgusting really lol, and nothing like the James Dean persona that my midseye was creating for me!! how I couldn't see that I was a hopeless nicotine junkie... I was going to say I don't know!... but I do, we all do. I'm so glad to have moved on from that episode of my life.

both my statements are true. I failed over and over until this time around, like everyone else other than those who did it once and did it right first time. why apologise for remembering things? that's not something to be sorry for.

I get what your saying, further down your journey you'll get what the Sarge is saying :-) for me initially, I would say that the process that I needed to follow was simple, and easy to follow, but not as easy to do as it is now. the only thing that made it less than easy after the initial 72 hour withdrawal was the inner chatter, but once that was silenced, by a combination of determination, time, and education, then the easy became easy peasy lemon squeezy :-)

When I tried quitting before, I was always just abstaining, trying to find something to make me not want to smoke. that's what I was trying to buy each time, something to change my mind for me and squash my desire. but nothing did, because we all know, nothing does, that comes from within yourself. anyway, I digress, in my failed quits, I was always bargaining with myself, for example, I'll quit, but allow myself one or two cigarettes a day as a reward, I calculated that I was only then smoking between 2.5 and 5% of my pre quit amount, and therefore I was very good, and should not feel bad, but feel triumphant instead. another deal, was the I'll smoke other peoples cigarettes, therefore I was no longer wasting money. I switched to roll your own cigarettes, therefore my habit was costing less, again, no guilt, but pride at how clever and economic I was. then I started putting filter tips in the roll your own cigarettes, so that they were healthier, again wasn't I good! I was always making stupid deals with myself about my smoking to try to justify my continued useage. This mindset often creeps into the freshly quit newbie. and it can be devastating and undermining to your best laid plans. try to recognise this bargaining, and address it, either personally, or by discussing it. but do it before the chatter becomes overwhelming.

very good Markus, I especially agree with your belief that still wanting to smoke is not part of the mindset required to build the weapons you need to arrest this addiction. I know from my own posts and responses that this an unpopular subject for some newbies, it always will be like kryptonite to the junkie mind. but it is completely accurate and true. and must be embraced before the quit can become more doable for these folks. I know, I've started and failed many a quit still wanting to smoke, and I never lasted past 5 and a half weeks!

have you ever fallen for the wrong guy or girl? The one everyone warned you about, the one who was mean to you, the one you couldn't imagine life without? the one who you knew was lying, but you hopelessly loved them? Do you miss them now? did the world stop turning? is your life empty and ruined and unbearable since walking away from them? or did you stay strong? did you learn to live again? did you go on to live a life you love? is your life filled with riches that could never have been if you had stayed with them, under their spell? addiction to a person defies our logic, and even puts us in danger, so does addiction to substances. but we can learn to live a better life without our addictions. remember the love struck teen you were, and how adamant you were in your defence of your love, see the similarities, and believe that you escape your addiction to cigarettes eventually too.

trying to decide which one of my very expensive cameras to take to Europe with me, or whether to take both, sometimes too many options create more (first world) problems!

firstly to answer this... Yes, You most certainly do, You are already doing it, so keep doing it, as it's working for you :-) and yes many people quit on a whim. I sort of did, I planned to quit at New Year, but woke on the morning of the 21st December, knowing that I had already quit when I went to bed the night before, just didn't know it at the time. it just felt right, and so I went with it. in many ways, it helps, because a plan can involve anxiety as the dreaded day draws close. we were just quit before we could analyse it too much.

Totally Awesome Jen :-) really really well done :-)

Awesome Amy, proud of you. You can and will do this :-)

It really sounds to me like you are preparing for abstinence, and hoping to not want to smoke anymore. although this is a valid method, it is probably one of the hardest after the cut down method. Allen Carr will help you understand that with the right mindset you can quit. but his method, like every method, requires effort and determination to kick the addiction into touch. I don't mean to sound like I'm being harsh on you, but you know that this is true, and I think that's why you're afraid to fail, because it's a very real prospect in your minds eye. try to finish the book today if you can, it can be read cover to cover in 6 hours (audiobook is this long) it will help you overcome these initial and fundamental stumbling blocks. we are all here to cheer you along :-)

I think you are afraid of the reality of going solo without your crutch, it's like being afraid to let go of the side of the pool, it can feel good to be free, but when panic sets into your mind, you reach for the side again. the water isn't that deep.... trust me :-) there is nothing that you can't do as well if not better as a non smoker.

remember those words, firstly, each second, then minute, then hour, then day, then week, then month, then year