Natalie... one of the greatest benefits of my quit was my confidence. I feel as though I am a badass that can quit a horrible addiction. My confidence is soaring...I am doing more...talking to people more and I am ready to take on the world. So to hear you say you were more confident with a smoke in your hand is poppycock (Love using that word). Hold on.. you are in a holding pattern of your quit right now... it will get better and better and better.
2ndly... I am the kind of person that what to get the sh it over with now... anticipation sucks. So I went out on my 2nd night quit. Went to BW3s to watch the National Championship. it sucked... the guy sitting next to me kept going outside to smoke and then he came back in and smelled magnificent. I almost asked him if I could lick his fingers... then I realized that was a little bit homosexual. Not that there is anything wrong with that. But I don't think my wife, whom was with me, or the biker dude would have appreciated it. Anywho... I remember want one sooooooo f ucking bad. I asked my wife if we could stop on the way home and get some... luckily she said no. In the morning I felt GREAT about my quit...it was stronger. Next time I went out partying it got easier and the next ....easier... until it was not even an issue anymore.
Do what you want...no one knows you more than you. if you can handle it... do it... it will get the bad stuff over with sooner.
You got this... hang on and keep on keepin on.
