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Ty,guys. Really. I’m still on/off crying and still want them this morning but just trying to do other shit to keep mind off it.

Keep grinding, Brioski. These extended periods are terrible--I still remember them more than twenty years after the fact. One of the things that helped me through them (at least a little bit) was my honest assessment that if I failed to maintain my quit I was not sure when or even if I would be able to quit again. Given how much I had invested in the process, that was a frightening thought, even more frightening I guess than the horrible current reality and the uncertainty of when (and IF!) things would get better. It had to be now, and the quit would take the shape (and include the misery) that it would. But it had to be now. And things DID get better--better than I could ever have imagined. That freedom and joy are waiting for you, too; in fact, I'd argue that you're developing even greater capacity for them through the very challenges that you're currently experiencing. That's not at all meant to minimize the difficulties themselves (I know, they SUCK), but it is meant as a reminder, a promise, and an expression of admiration of the transformation you are making. You're doing it, friend; keep grinding. Wishing you strength and peace-- Christian99 21+ Years Quit

I like the point @robin0212 made about making a list, even if just mentally, of all the good things you're experiencing since quitting. That's a big part of getting past those thoughts that smoking again will somehow help us deal with crap going on in our lives that upsets us. You know, those thoughts about smoking helping us deal with problems & stress in our life is actually complete BS but our junkie brain has been trained to believe a smoke helps for years and years. All a smoke does is relieve nicotine withdrawal stress and gives us some time to think about how to solve out real problems. In reality, after being quit for some time, I've found dealing with life's problems & stress is a lot easier and more efficient without smoking! I no longer have that additional issue to deal with ... you know; the monkey on your back whispering "have just one ... it'll make life wonderful again" LIES, all lies! Take stock of what you've done to date! It's incredible!!! Don't ever let that go to waste. That would be a travesty and it would truly crush you! Fight to live another day smoke free. It'll be worth it!

Smart strategy. Distraction is a mighty powerful tool. I think making it through the first major crisis of our quits is tough. The longing to revert is really strong. Even though the notion that smoking will soothe us is a lie, as Reciprocity said, the pull is there. The nature of that first crisis is different for everyone. (For me it was the sudden and painful death of my mom 4 months into my quit.) But we do emerge on the other side with stronger quits and without situations made worse by relapsing. Crying is a natural and healing response to the kind of difficulties you are going through. I sometimes feel like smoking arrested or thwarted the process of healing from hurts. But now - free from that limiting force - moving through the process of metabolizing grief and anger WITHOUT smoking eventually allows for deeper healing to happen, like Christian said. In the meantime, stay busy, be kind to yourself, and protect that precious quit.

Good job @Brioski hang in there.

You will come through this Brioski, you have been doing so well!! You know that smoking won't bring that little boy back. It's a terrible tragedy but please don't smoke! It won't help you and you will feel horrible afterwards. We are all here for you to help you get through this. I gave into my 6 year quit back in 2015 because my husband was having a heart ablation and I was so scared and nervous. Well, thankfully he was fine but I became addicted to cigarettes again. Me smoking didn't make him coming through the surgery. All going back to smoking did was take a really good 6 year quit away and make me an addict again! You are doing so well, please stay on the train. We are all here for you!!!

Aww B Sorry im late time difference sucks sometimes .. Be extra kind to yourself rewiring our brain takes time ,we have to learn how to cope without our addiction ..you will sweetie . Turn a negative into a positive You are a strong woman..who has come through stress smoke free Time heals ,give yourself the time .x

Congratulations @Sandi149 on another month of freedom You are doing great! Have a nice day and treat yourself special today

Great job, Brioski. You are doing great in your quit, do not let anything take it away from you. I'm sorry that you are struggling but we all know a cigarette will not solve anything. It will just make things far worse. Keep up the great work in protecting and keeping your quit.

NOPE

Grief and anger… what a duo of triggers you are having!! I am so sorry for your tough times. Stay strong, dear. I know the “Screw it I’m in a lot of pain and everything sucks so I might as well smoke” feeling all too well. I threw away a multi-year quit in a moment like that, at my father in law’s funeral. “Just one” led to another and another, and before I knew it I was in bondage all over again. The temptation to smoke waits for us in the tall grass and pounces when we are vulnerable. But smoking did not stop the pain. All it did was make me feel even more wretched. Smoking never brought a loved one back or solved an argument. And poisoning myself brought no comfort. So hang onto your beautiful, precious quit, even when things around you seem grim. You can do this. Hang in there!

Congratulations on 2 months Sandi!!! You are doing amazing!

Congratulations on 2 months smoke free @Sandi149 Fantastic job!

Thank you so much Jill! I can't believe it's been two months already!

Don't go buy. Tomorrow will be better. Make a list of all the great things about not smoking and shut those negative thoughts down

NOPE!

G’day NOPE .....Not One Puff Ever.... (replace Ever with Min,Hour, Day as required).

Awesome! @Sandi149 congrats, you are rockin your quit, so happy for you.

Well done, Sandi!! You’ve worked hard for your quit, and it’s fantastic to see it take flight. Congrats on two months!

Nope

Oh @Brioski, I'm so sorry to be late to respond too. You've had a rough time because of the death of that little boy and his funeral. These are the times that nicotine tries the hardest to worm its way back in. Just stand your ground like you have been doing. You can do this! Please let us know how you're doing.....

NOPE

Congratulations @Paul723 on a decade quit! Thank you so much for sticking around and paying it forward Have a great dat!

Congrats of reaching your 2nd big quit milestone Sandi! You've built a great foundation for a live long quit. Enjoy all those benefits you're realizing now that you're not chained to the cig any longer!

Well done Brioski for pushing through the discomfort! You are a star, building those quit muscles

Good work B Hang in there ..this too will pass..Try to imagine how gutted you would feel if you threw your wonderful Quit away .. This is one thing you can control. Life,s curve balls you carn t.. I know you have got this Sweethesrt xx

Believe me brioski, we all hated it, that's why we keep our quits so that we don't have to go through it again!!

I feel your pain Brioski (I've been crying for 2 days!), but..you have come too far. 5 plus months!! We are learning to cope girl! We never had coping skills. Well we did, but that was SMOKING! So now, we cry. It will get better. It has to right? It took a year my last quit before I began to feel comfortable in my own skin. We have to own this and move forward. You got thru a tough time this past week and you are still grieving that little boy. Your mind is trying to trick you. Smoking will only lead to feeling sh*tty. And then starting over will TOTALLY SUCK. This is temporary and you are strong enough to handle being a little uncomfortable. Let's just cry it out and move on. You can totally do this.

Thanks everyone!! I appreciate it!! I am plugging along and still taking one day at a time.

Big congrats on 10 years, that is awesome!

Congratulations, Paul! All you folks in the decade+ league are a big inspiration!

Congratulations on 10 years smoke free, Paul. Awesome job.

NOPE!

NOPE!

Still feeling shitty. I don’t think I’ll go buy anything. These feelings really really suck. Also in an argument w hubs. I hate this shit.

9

Congratulations Sandi on your second month being quit! You have done an amazing job of it and you should be so very proud of yourself!

Nice job Paul! A decade without the smokes is something to be very proud of' congrats!

Let those tears run their course Bri. You will be stronger for it. I know you will stick with your quit. You’ve overcome so much. I hope that you are feeling much better now. I hate that you posted this a good while ago and that no one has been on to respond. Please let us know how you are doing.

Ty friends Just got home, long day, today was the funeral/service for my student that passed…sadness all around, really wanted one today (or ten). I spoke at the service. That was hard. But I guess I can do hard things. Love u all thank u

Wooohooo big congrats!

Glad you’re recovering and doing well!

Way to go @Brioski! Congrats on a well-earned five months. A good excuse for a party… I’ll bring the balloons!

I’m glad to hear that you are well again and that you are still smoke free!

@Brioski, congratulations on 5 months! Wahoo! The months are adding up!

Wow! Cograts Bri on your 5 months of smoke free living!! You'll be at a half year before you know it. Those milestones keep piling up when you commit to NOPE!

There are a number of ways to post a song but I find this one pretty easy. Bring up the song you want to post on your browser (Google or whatever browser you're using). Once the You Tube video is playing; left click on it to pause it then right click on the video screen. A new window will appear. Left click on "Copy video URL". Then go to the Songs of Yesterday page and left click on "reply". Then just right click in the reply box and then left click on paste. The You Tube video should the appear and you can then left click on submit reply like this:

3. Bleach yo hair