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TL;DR It's story time again, so anyone that wants to view the train wreck that is my conscious mind, welcome aboard...viewer discretion advised. Disclaimer, I'm not a doctor although I do play one on TV in some of my more carnal fantasies. Now that we got that out of the way, let's get this party started. I will be 120 days quit when I wake up tomorrow morning. That's quite an accomplishment for me since I'm pretty sure I made this whole process as hard as I could possibly make it. There was nothing glamourous or pleasant about it. I feel like I fought for every second for the first 3 months. It was quite the battle...still is although I do get some wonderful times where I don't think about cigarettes or quitting or being quit. The problem is that inevitably I end up realizing that I'm not thinking about it at all which ends up with me thinking about it. Of course, the only way to realize how pleasant the moment was is for the moment to end. It's like that for pretty much everything though. The positive to come out of all this mental carnage and anguish is the self discovery that has taken place. I have found that denying myself certain crutches that I felt I needed to maintain the quit actually made the quit go much easier. Then giving into those desires made the quit go right back to being as hard as the first week...which is where I'm at right now. So to help me get back on track and maybe you if you're struggling and looking for answers to questions you don't know how to ask is to see where we came from and why. First and most important, we must understand that as a smoker we did get a benefit from smoking. Now there was one hell of a price to pay for that benefit but nevertheless we need to address it so we can figure out how to get that same benefit without the cigarette and maybe at the same time reverse some of the damage that we did to ourselves. So what was the benefit. This is where you need to go back and reread the disclaimer. I'm winging this off the top of my head from hours and hours of reading different papers and I didn't take any notes so if you want call me out as being full of shit I'm ok with that and won't ask for any citations as I'm not providing any here. Moving on... Smoking curbs the appetite, raises the acid level in the stomach and increases the glucose level in the blood. That's in addition to the changes in brain chemistry which is beyond what I'm addressing here. So how are these 3 such a benefit you might ask? First is the obvious, weight control. If you appetite is diminished you eat less, The various hormonal responses from these reactions make the transport of fat out of the adipose cells into the liver where it can be turned into ketones for energy causes you to have more energy which makes you feel better for a moment. Increased glucose levels in the blood means that sugar cravings are diminished. Raising the acid level in the stomach can eliminate acid reflux. There is a sphincter muscle at the bottom of the esophagus that needs a minimal level of acidity in the stomach to work properly, so increased stomach acid closes this sphincter which tells the body that it's full and doesn't need food. Now think about the benefits of fasting and cellular autophagy and you can begin to piece together the benefits that one could get from smoking. Shit, smoking is sounding pretty good right about now, eh? Well settle down cause remember I said those benefits had one hell of a price tag on them. What is that price tag, you may ask. In a word, collagen. You ever look at someone who has smoked since their early teens and they look like they are twice their age? That's because tobacco smoke strips the body of collagen. (quick note here, I'm purposefully avoiding the topic of cancer since the only person I knew who died with lung cancer was my sister who never smoked a day in her life.) Collagen is very important for maintaining the elasticity of the airways in the lungs and in the circulatory system. I also believe that smoking causes a systemic inflammation that can wreak all kinds of havoc on the body, But for now, lets just focus on the collagen aspect of it. And that focus comes down to emphysema. As the collagen is stripped from the lungs the air sacs cant compress on the exhale and push all the air out and the passages leading up to those air sacs collapse trapping that air making those air sacs useless. That's a very pedestrian description of the issue but it should be close enough to scare the smoke out of you. There are other effects in the circulatory system that I didn't even look for since the respiratory problems were enough to give me nightmares for the forseeable future. So those are the three main "beneficial" reactions we get from smoking and our goal is to find out how to get these benefits without the smoke. Here is the best I can offer. First, we need to find out if we are addicted to sugar and was the smoking addiction masking the sugar addiction. In my case it most definitely was and if I don't fix that nothing else will work. Through experimentation I have found that elimination is the best remedy. It's pretty much how you quit anything you're addicted to right? Jus quit putting it in your body. I found the best way was to replace the sugar with fat. Coconut oil and ghee in your coffee in the morning and after about a week you won't even care if you get your coffee or not and sugary snacks don't really even invade your thoughts that much. Of course it's like any other addiction, there are triggers but it's orders of magnitude easier to ignore than smoking triggers. Which coincidently got much easier to ignore as well. As far as I can tell the sugar addiction and the nicotine addiction are so intertwined that trying to defeat only one will definitely weaken you to the point of relapse. Best to bite the bullet and crush them both while your at it. The next thing to do is heal your gut and get your stomach acid built back up. Taking a few tablespoons of apple cider vinegar in some water once or twice a day and a few tablespoons of lemon and/or lime juice will definitely help the bloating and the digestion. Getting some exercise and doing some breath work will also improve your mood. The last thing i've tried is going carnivore. I think there are some real benefits to that. I believe that the body is more intelligent than we can ever understand and if we give the body the correct ingredients it will heal itself of most diseases. I have read some anecdotal evidence of emphysema symptoms being vastly improved from eating basically nothing but ruminant animal meat. i think this has to do with the collagen being replenished in the areas where the smoking had previously stripped it. I have not found any studies to back this up and it may not have any merit but I know from first hand experience that it lessens the cravings for smoking. So why all this massive wall of text, yoda? Well, I needed to remind myself that I had found all the answers to the questions I could think of up to this point, and to prove it I went backwards for the last week and a half so I could document the progress for myself and anyone else who might care. Starting Sunday morning I begin the real journey. The Christmas feasting will be done and the road to health and wealth begins. I will document it here in this thread with some stats and thoughts. I started my quit almost 4 months ago at 165 pounds. I'm at 198 pounds and will probably be over 200 by Sunday morning. In 4 months I'm going to take back my health. The goal is to not put anything in my mouth and set fire to it and LGN...(look good naked). I know the LGN part sounds shallow and vain but the purpose is to regain my mental health. The willpower it has taken to beat this demon has taken it's toll on me physically, mentally and emotionally. Accomplishing LGN while maintaining the quit, which I've actually proven to myself makes the quit easier, will make all the things I quit smoking for that much better. Also with spring time only months away I can feel a weakness will creep in with the warmer weather and I need to harden myself for it. So the journey begins Sunday morning. Until then Merry Xmas to all.

Nope!!!

Nope...Let's get this party started. Thank you very much, Thank you very much. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. I think those are the right words from a Christmas Carol movie Scrooge. It took all his life to figure out what is important. All of you are telling this is to another everyday. I thank all of you each day for keeping me safe. For teaching me I do not have to smoke. For teaching me to value the things I should love and appreciate everyday. To embrace the joy and happiness that I have been given. Although many of us have been given so many challenges we have to overcome, that we have been given the chance to do better. We can love ourselves, our family and friends in our time on this earth. We can choose not to give up, we can spend many more years being the best we can be. I think these are all worth while things for giving up smoking. I hope you do to!! Merry Christmas!!

To all new quitters !! Dont let the holiday season give you a excuse to throw your life saving quit Down the toilet ... Your life may depend on it .... Please use the SOS thread ,if you feel your quit is in trouble ... Or PM either me or Jillar .... I'm sure we will not be too far away .... I will have my frying pan at the ready ....be warned .... Be careful of your alcohol in take ....I've seen many quits fail due to thinking they could handle the booze .... Merry Xmas Newbies ,not so New ,and Oldies ...

@intoxicated yodaThank you-I appreciate the honesty with which you outlined your "case" and then came to the conclusion we all come to. I think if we hadn't (most of us?) started smoking in our teens, we would have found other ways to deal with the "need" for the smoke's "benefits." But who cares? That is the past. We are all quit today which is a yuletide blessing. We have today what every smoker wants-to not smoke. It was WAY WORSE when we were smoking. Recovery is a process not an event and I thank you for sharing your process with me (us). Merry Christmas everyone!

Most folks who travel on the Train ,at some point in there quit focuses more on there weight ,more than the cigs ...it's a different process for each person ...I sense your getting there Yoda.... Remember it's not just cancer ,the whole of your body is effected by smoking .... I joined this group fighting to hang on to both feet ... Staying quit before that red button is pressed is the wisest move .... I have every faith in you Yoda....and know you can complete this journey ..... Love following your story ....and who knows how many people you are helping ... Stay Close .... Merry Smoke Free Xmas

Good luck! @intoxicated yodaYou’ve come so far these past few months and although the battle is still on—you’ve got game!

I am right here as are others that I am sure will jump in any minute. I am sorry you are having a rough time tonight. Just keep up slow deep breathing. Turn on the TV to see if there is something to focus on. Trust me, the crave will pass, I learned that here. You think it is your body but is really your brain leading you into almost a panic that we think a cigarette will help, it is just a response that your brain is used to so you think you have to smoke. You do not have to, you have to just sit back and let the feeling wash over you, accept it for what it is, just an addiction, a need you think will solve the problem. It will not, we have to work our way thru it. K

They are telling you the truth. It is going to be hard. You might cry and feel like you are losing your mind. It is in fact that we have been addicted to a drug. It is a painful thing to give up somethng that we thought was just a habit, that we do something that does not matter. They often say that quiting smoking is harder than quiting so called drug addiction. Guess what smoking is an addiction to nicotine. It is so much easier to give in to our addiction. We can walk into any store and buy this drug legally. We can use this drug in public. As far as I know there are no rehab programs that treat nicotine addiction. The world still sees smoking as choice, they do not understand this for the drug addiction it is. There in lies the problem. We are left to fight this battle on our own. Welcome to rehab, all of us here are going thru rehab. Many have done it, they are the professionals that will help us. I am six months in but I am still in rehab. I have not yet made it to the point that I don't want to smoke but I am to the point where I know I am not going to smoke. I take this as a victory, a celebration. Nothing done well is without sacrifice, we have done these hard things before and we can do this one. We just talk to each other when things are tough. There are so many here to support you, just reach out. We will be here.

NOPE.

N.O.P.E.

Sunrises are the reminders that there is always a new day if it didn't work out yesterday it will work out today

3. your cat

nope

Meanwhile, Down under Its Christmas Day, well 12.32am.... stick in isolation pending a negative test result but at least the soundtrack is good... Now if you were an Aussie parent you'd have all the dance moves to this one down pat.... cos Santa Claus is coming....

NOPE

Sal, no judgement here, the cannabis thing, not legal in my state, wish it was, maybe it would help my migraines but I would go with the edibles like Jillar. I also take medication for anxiety, many of us do. Now if you tell me you rob banks by day and are a serial killer by night that would be a problem. Your problem is that you smoke and you have to quit. You know you must and you just have to accept it. Once I got thru a few days it got easier. It will, you just have to start believing in yourself. You may not enjoy it now but you will later.

G’day There’s got to be a point when you stop and don’t look back. Starving yourself of nicotine for a period then re enforcing the crave by giving in to it in the end is a special type of torture. My quit didn’t start with a last cig it started on the day I didn’t have a cig. At 8:30 that morning I hadn’t had a cig I took all the packets I had and drowned them. Same with the ashtrays wet them and dumped the lot in the bin. Then took my sweetheart to a movie and got on with the day. Yep I had craves but ignored them 5 mins later they left because I didn’t give them any power over me. Cause they came back but guess what they lose there strength. One of the first to disappear completely was that first smoke of the day one. Because they were ignored they lost there power I would not have believed that as a smoker but it’s true. PS yep my sweetheart took 4 days to figure out I’d stopped. Yep I was proud,

I know the craves seem unbearable, but it's the cigarettes that cause the crave. The more you smoke the more you crave. You are stronger than any crave if you want to be. I know it's not easy but damn it feels good to just breathe.

@Sal I feel you brother. I was there only I didn't have a wife to bother. What kept me from smoking was walking and breathing deep. I would and still do walk at night if the craves start to get to me. Also try listening to some self hypnosis vids on youtube. I think over time they do help.

G’day My youngest made it up from Melbourne, haven’t seen him in too long and his mum just can’t leave him for a min. I’m pushing to get some time with him. We were to be hosted at my nephews but my great nephews in hospital with pneumonia. Poor little tyke is only 18 months old and has been pretty sick but he will get out tonight. Last min I’m getting things together with my boys and we are getting everything we need for 6 people and heading of to nephews on Christmas morning. So this has turned out a Christmas to remember for many different reasons ……..

NOPE…

NOPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

7. Santa's grandson when @Linda is done with him

6 Santa's grandson

@jillar Yep, us Michigan girls do not like a naked tree!!

NOPE!

7. Picture ornaments @Linda, you put your tree skirt on your tree?! It must be a Michigan thing because we put them under the tree

@jillar she just finished up and is on her way.

5. Tree topper @intoxicated yoda, can you send my cat back? I don't know how she got all the way over there to your tree!!!

4 Handmade gingerbread people

NOPE…

@Sal those are all just everday life things we do. Smoking after these things were just a habit, part of the ritual we followed that don't make sense. Whe do we smoke after we do those things, just because we always have so it will take time to accept it is not necessary. Will you crave, yes, will you drop deadi f you don't. No, you may not be happy about it but you have to keep telling your self it is just a habit and you can get thru it. If it makes easier pick something else, chew sugar free gum, brush your teeth, file your nails, clean your tools, anything just pick something else/

@intoxicated yoda we've had worse lol. I was pretty whiney myself my first few months quit. Sadly those posts got lost when the forum I was on back then imploded. @Sal if you're really serious about quitting then maybe tell your wife not to give in to you. Or if she's serious about quitting to then ask her to go ahead and quit with you. That way there's no cigarettes in the house.

@Sal they are hard for everyone but you can do it. I was the whiniest little bitch on this forum when i first quit. Jillar can attest to that. and if i can beat it anybody can. the first thing to do is accept that you want to quit. the addiction will try to convince you otherwise but you know you want to quit or you wouldn't be here. also accept that it will not be easy, but it will be worth it

Have yourself a merry little Christmas folks.

Three traditional classics from Nat King Cole...

Hello Mr. and Mrs. Sal I am writing this to both of you. I hope Mrs. Sal will join the board as well. She is going to deal with quitting that are not the same as you. She may feel things diffrent than you do and need support in a different way. It is an individual journey and I see that women handle things in a different direction that she might need. I have just made it to the six month mark. I quit upon having a cat scan of the chest that showed the beginning signs of emphysema. When you know there is no choice then there is no choice. That is what made it real for me. Most linsurance offer this under preventative care. You should see if that is covered under your insurance. If it is, get the scan. I used nicotine replacement therapy in the way of lozenges. I had used chantix, gum, patchs without sucess in the past. The lozenges helped me thru the first part. Knowing I was making permanent bad things really sealed the deal. You can lie to yourself all you want but that is what you are doing. You are more important than any craving. For me I just accepted I could not pretend any more. That helps everytime I get a crave...do I crave to live or do I crave to die. That is the simple truth. You can do this!!

Welcome aboard Sal. Good call on giving up the smokes. You get past the cravings by going through the cravings. There's no other way. Cravings are temporary. With the right commitment you can ride out any craving. Buckle up, knuckle down, and drive on.

Welcome! So glad you are here. Most of us (including me) have tried numerous times to quit and we always find a reason to start again. I did Allan Carr's book/seminars which really helped this time. Everyone has a different approach but after using NRT, this time I am cold-turkey. I think it is ultimately easier. The thing that I learned is while smoking, I WAS ALWAYS IN WITHDRAWAL. In other words, our entire smoking history we are craving. Going through a quit and understanding the craving will go away is an amazing shift in thinking. Because it does go away. We don't know how we will feel "smober" until we do it. The last couple of days for me have been rough (emotional things) and I have thought about smoking. But blessedly haven't done it. I know that it will only make things worse. Again, not saying it is easy but I think smoking is harder believe it or not. Happy to have you (and your wife) here. Being on line makes a HUGE difference!

I am completely nicotine free . Nowadays when i have an uneasy feeling or restlessness or or some cravings which i cant control . I chew black pepper instead . Believe it or not , The cravings and the anxiety goes away after chewing it . Whenever the anxiety and cravings comes again , i chew the black pepper again . It has been working for me . That way i don't have to depend on sweets or junk foods for a better feeling . Maybe it will work for you too

4 diamond tennis bracelet

G’day NOPE .....Not One Puff Ever.... (replace Ever with Min,Hour, Day as required)

I just had a horrible craving that I could not get control of, so....I went out to Braums and got some cottage cheese. How strange is that? I have never been a fan but for the last month or so I have wanted cottage cheese. God help me if I decide I want sardines.

a week and a day is a huge accomplishment. stay with it

Welcome aboard @Sal, you've come to the right place to get your forever quit! I found my first support forum at three weeks quit and am sure that without the support I received from people who had gone before me or walking beside me I wouldn't have succeeded. Stick close, we have quitters from all over the world so there's almost always someone here 24/7 to help you past a bad crave. And if you can make it a few months than you can make it a few more. And we want to help you do it We have lots of great sub forums here from the SOS board where you'll post if you feel your quit is in danger so we can give you some extra support, to our Social boards for when you want to stick close but get your mind off smoking thoughts for a while. And there's lots of everything in those from exercise and food to music and games. So lets get this done once and for all ok?

Ya smoking sucks and dying sucks worse Your urges to smoke are no greater than anyone else's, sorry to say. The will to not smoke has to win the battle over the will to smoke, and until that day dawns you'll always just lurk here. Join the club- quit sticking something in your mouth and lighting it. It will be tough at first, but you'll slowly gain confidence in your quit as it gets stronger every day. Choose you, it's the best gift you can give yourself this holiday season. And hope to see ya around

G’day The borders are coming down from this COVID mess we having been living in and we will have our youngest up from Melbourne. We haven’t seen him in 3 years so Christmas is very dear to us this year. Christmas is at my nephews in the shade of a marque. Heaps of tiger prawns and Morten bay bugs and cold slices of leg ham and heaps of salads. Couple of trays of mangos and cherrys of course. I’ve put a special order from my son for him to bring us some peach’s. they are so much better from Victoria. No overweight triffle this year. Me and my sweetheart are off the sugars and carbs and the weight is peeling off. A quick recipe for joe for guilt free chocolate moose and cream. Choc moose Couple of ripe avacardo into a blender Add sweetener of choice I use cal free stevia vanilla a good coco powder teaspoon chilled water blend till thick and Chocolaty Non dairy cream a can of coconut milk leave in the fridge for 6 hours. open and the can and spoon the cream that seperates from the water. In to the bender and whip till creamy. You can add suger and vanilla but I don’t bother. Alternate layers of choc moose and cream in a glass and refrigerate. Trust me don’t tell them what’s in it and they will not ask. Pic doesn’t show them in fancy glasses but they taste as good