Nov-16-2013

Today, an extreme stressor happened. It was completely my fault. I was turning left and got a text and looked down at the screen to see what it said. Which is obviously a big no-no. as I started turning is when I was looking at it and I made way too wide of a turn and ran up the small curb and knocked out a fire hydrant. completely jacked up the the front right of my vehicle...popped my tire messed up the wheel. And, for the first time had an air bag deployed in my face. which bruised my arm and I now have knot to show this. So I am carless until it gets fixed and it sucks. The whole thing just completely sucked. A friend stopped what they were doing to come sit with me while I figured out what to do and waited for a tow truck. I was so pissed off at myself and the whole situation. I still am. I didnt really want one but I told him as he was sitting there while I was crying that I should just say screw all this and have a cigarette since there was a gas station right there. He isn't a smoker and never was. But he knew what to say. He told me that it wouldn't fix anything and that I would be so much more mad at myself than just because of the car...because Id be angry at myself for throwing away all this time I already put into not smoking. (which I already knew and was shocked he understood that that is what would have happened instead of saying oh well you can quit again tomorrow) ....then I realized I had my last piece of gum already and I just started crying more and he whips out some altoids and hands them over and I just chew one after the other. Sounds gross but it was really helpful. My little hero I am now calling him. I am still in distress over this situation and not having a car until insurance gets it together and figures it out and fixes it and wont probably be for a week or two for everything I am assuming. But he definitely saved me earlier...I dont think I would have had a cigarette as I wasnt about to go anywhere looking like I did crying like that but he was supportive and comforting...it was like I had all of you with me in this person.

Lesson learned (which I already knew but ignored) put the phone away while driving.....it is stupid not to.