Friends, just random people you meet who can make a difference
This might be 'just an online forum', but today many have shown me they are more then online friends. Behind a screen yes, but without judgmental views or misunderstanding. They might not grasp all of me, but they accept me.
This is one of the rarest forums where I've encounters such a thing.
People judge you, how you dress, if you're fat or to thin, if you're on drugs.
Instead of an 'get over it' respond, I received so many supportive replies when hit rock bottom today. Peptalk yes, but it kept me going. Something told me the majority of the members of this forum is worth to be trusted.
I almost ran out for cigs, even thought of self injury and none of happen because people backed me up.
I'm a fighter but sometimes I fight with myself. Looking in the mirror asking when the pain will end. But I did not pick up that razor and and called a friend, cried out loud. And you know what so many on the forums where right, the pain, the grief is there but not all the time - my little SOS topic made me realize I had to sit it out.
And now I'm like a shinning star, sitting behind my desk - knowing I have friends... maybe far away behind a screen.
And although all of it is my responsibility; lighting up a cig or cutting, it helps to know I have people backing me up.
Because it means I'm not alone in my fight. They might be bystanders but they are are ready to advice me or give me virtual hug, a bump.
If you think you make no difference, think again. You just did to me, today.
- 12
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