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Jackie66's Blog

A blog by JackiMac in General

  • Entries

    11

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    59

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    14717

About this blog

I finally did It!

Entries in this blog

Nicotine here is the door

Im tired, Im emotional, Im stressed, Im running from place to place, I shake my fist up to the sky and say Please enough already, I plod, I'm not at work, I'm not doing my exercises, I'm not sleeping, I'm not eating, but the most important thing through all these I'm nots is I AM NOT SMOKING, I thought I would crumble, after my relapse, I honestly thought that at the next part of high stress I would just smoke, but I didn't, have I finally realised and accepted that smoking really is not an opti

FOUR FEET IN HEAVEN - For Smudge RIP 14/09/14

Your favourite chair is vacant now no eager purrs to greet me no softly padded paws to run ecstatically to meet me no coaxing rubs no plaintive cry will say its time for feedings ive put away your bowl and all the things you wont be needing but I will miss you little friend for I could never measure the happiness you bought me the comfort and the pleasure and since god put you here to share in earthly joy and sorrow I'm sure there'll be a place for you in heaven's bright tomorrow

Smudge

Been all over the place today, my mum's wee cat, Smudge who is 19 is having breathing difficulties, has air and fluid on the lungs. He was rushed to the emergency vets last night and has had two more incidences since. My mum has just called he is being rushed up to a special Vetinary hospital in Glasgow. If any place can save him they will be able to. Could all you animal lovers out there please send special prayers for him. He is a very special cat

Sometimes

I have literally not sat down today, my son has decided to move in with his girlfriend....she lost her mum when she was 16 and kind of lost her way in the world, to cut a long story short her flat was a disgrace, hadn't been cleaned for years, rubbish piled up, dirty clothes you get the picture. Lovely sweet girl, last 3 weekends I have been down, cleaning, scrubbing, brushing, dusting, doing piles of laundry, Basically showing her what needs to be done. I am exhausted, they both smoke very h

Feeling good about riding this train

Good Good day today, feel refreshed, feel alive and feel happy, if anyone is interested you can see my facebook page and check out the post my darling OH posted of me today, singing unawares LOL!. I still can't believe I stirred the pot, I boiled up a big black cauldron, I added some insecurity, stress, a sprinkle of doubt, two tablespoons of sleepless nights, and a pinch of a notion, as I stirred the notion grew and grew, it bubbled, it got hotter, I could smell the potion and I wanted to tast

I Lost my grip and I fell

The junkie is always with us, and I gave him room to breathe, not knowing how fast and lethal his grip on me would become in a matter of seconds, what I take from my fall is to always guard my quit, to remember that however bad the crave is to begin smoking again is really bad, I do not want to be a smoker I want to live my life smoke free, I want to be free from the demon inside but I now understand that underneath the surface he will be lurking. I will get through hell and heck week and unde

So Close to a Cigarette today

Long working day for me on a Thursday, have not thought about smoking at work at all and dont miss it, until today. We have a new Service Control Manager that has started, young 23, adorable, and today he kept disappearing for 5 to 10 mins at a time, yuuup a smoker!! I challenged him today, could smell it all the time, all the receptors pinged in my brain, arggghhh no not now, told him I had stopped over 4 months ago, and his reply "give into the crave," WTF....took out his packet of cigarette

Sometimes on the Journey we take a step back

I'm nearly at 4 months quit, and there is no way that I want to go back to smoking but I could sure as hell have one today. The Quit Smoking Journey is a lot of walking slowly up hill and then speed racing down the otherside with the wind blowing in your face, Going up and down these hills on a daily basis becomes part of our life, we get used to it, Then all of a sudden you come to the bottom of a mountain, looking up all we can see are pitfalls, crevices hidden from us, but there waiting to

Nicely Put

Just read a recent blog entry entitled "I am not a spokesperson for quitting smoking" (bows to soberjulie) I wrote a reply and liked it so much lol that I thought I would add it to mine   i'm not going to beat myself up because some days I crave the nicotine, it was part of my life for so long that I don't expect it to be an easy journey, no quit is right or wrong, but if I can help that one person get through their day a little bit easier, if I can pay it forward just a little then I feel th

Remembering the past 3 months.

Pinched some of my previous entries from we know where just to remind me of where I was at certain points in my quit!   27 March 2014 - 06:27 PM   Started to post this in Quits recent post about topics, but whilst writing a flurry of replies appeared and was worried it would get swallowed up in the great abyss. I'm approaching the 3 month mark and have read posts about 3/3/3/ stages, I have climbed here fairly ok, a few bad times where I almost bought cigarettes but found the support here s

Over 3 months in and I've just started my blog

I was always the last one to do anything, which explains why over 3 months in and I've only just decided to start documenting my wonderful quit. It could also explain why it took me to the age of 48 before I finally quit, quit for good. Over the last 30 odd years like any other smoker, I've thought about quitting, talked about quitting, read about quitting, been to my GP about quitting, quitted on a few occasions, sometimes for a day, sometimes for a week, sometimes for months and once when I

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